Becoming an adult is a very disappointing process, 1/10 - would not recommend.

Life used to feel magical. But age kills the mystery and we're left with taxes, bills, work and responsibility. We stop wondering what today will bring, the excitement and zest for life, dies long before our bodies die and what is left is an adult husk of a human being who is usually deprived of energy and who gradually stops caring about anything because caring costs energy. People fear the zombie apocalypse, not knowing that they are already in one. Old, narcissistic people with no spare energy to care for anything except themselves and those nearest to them are everywhere. The living dead already rule this world.

Perhaps that is why I am trying to rediscover the magic that was lost to me when I got older.

Perhaps it is an attempt to come back to life. Today I shall place a coin in a glass jar, sprinkle honey and cinnamon on top of it, write a note of intent and call it a money spell. I expect money will come to me when I need it because that is what this particular spell does. And if it does not work, at least I have made space for the mystery in my life. Which is a kind of magic of its own. A return to childhood wonder. Then, perhaps I will go looking for pretty rocks. I remember finding and collecting them everywhere, when I was a child.

So that is where all this spiritual searching has taken me. Back to the beginning. Perhaps the reason why we die is so we can live again. Jesus I think said it, we have to become like children again. And I agree.